I'll be the first to admit that sometimes the only reason I keep going over to Snap Fitness and letting Malibu Stacey force me to do all the exercises I sort of hate, is because she makes me laugh. And sometimes I just need to laugh.
Yesterday I walked into the gym at 10:00 a.m. on the dot, because there's no sense in being early to exercise, in my opinion.
I saw Stacey disappear around a corner and say my name. I tried to follow the sound of her voice, but I couldn't find her. She was engaging me in a game of hide-and-seek, apparently.
Maybe she was trying to get me to warm up by walking around the gym instead of just Twittering about myself?
I learned a long time ago that if you're lost in the woods, follow the river down stream, or better yet, just stay in one place until someone finds you. Hopefully, you thought ahead and brought snacks, in case you're sitting under a tree for a long time waiting to be rescued.
I always bring snacks, and I don't mind being rescued.
Stacey finally found me, and immediately told me I looked thinner (which is always good to hear) but what the hell was wrong with my hair?
"Oh," I said "Is it really that bad?"
"Yep, it is. What is with all the gray? You look more like Chubby GRANNY than Chubby Mommy. Don't tell me you've been coloring it at home? And the bangs thing didn't really work out so well, did it?"
And then, right then and there, she whipped out her cell phone and called Rachel, her cute-as-a -button hair girl, and proceeded to tell her that I'd be coming in getting my hair done and writing about it on my blog, and then Rachel's phone would soon be ringing off the hook with Chubby Mommy Running Club readers who will want Rachel to make them look cute again too.
And Rachel will be sort of a celebrity then, Stacey told her, and also Stacey has been getting new clients because of her Chubby Mommy Trainer status, and people in line at Starbucks even shout "Hey look! It's Malibu Stacey, from Chubby Mommy!" and then she hands them a business card. Because she is good at marketing.
And of course Rachel the hair girl was all in, and now I'm excited to get cute hair again. Stacey has that effect on people after all.
So then I said "Stacey, who else do you know? Cause I could use a few other things to write about..."
And then she said, "Honey, I know everyone, and you need a complete life makeover."
And then I knew we were on to something, because boy, do I ever need a life makeover.
So Julie and Stacey and the Chubby Mommy Running Club are now open for sponsorship and bribery for shameful self-promotion. Hollywood agents encouraged to apply.
Please email me at julieanderson (at) hotmail.com and we'll work something out.
And remember, Stacey is hot and looks good in designer sportswear. I'm just sayin'. And of course I'm happy to sample food and drinks, too.